When the hell did customer service go to shit? I just want to know because it seems like the more I deal with the service industry, the less service I get. Over the weekend when I was allowed out of the house under intense scrutiny and supervision, I found my ensemble for the black tie event I am attending tomorrow evening. No thanks to my mother and her sister who kept trying to make me look like a cross between a waitress and the entertainment. I don’t know what was going on with the two of them, but their choices for a black tie industry event were beyond questionable.
The first outfit was some sparkle-laden top that screamed "Enchanted Evening at the VFW". I QUICKLY shot that down. Then my mother found this skirt that was above the knee, black and had more ruffles than a damn petticoat. She attempted to pair this Harper Valley PTA nightmare with a white satin wrap top that had a big glittery broach attached to it. I tried to gently explain that this was an "industry" event, not the holiday party at Office Depot. My aunt (god love her) tried her best to step in and help. She picked out this floor length goddess number that I thought was beautiful...but I didn’t want folks to think I was channeling Diana Ross. I mean it was really nice, but it was sorta low cut in the front and really um...really just over the top. Then my mother suggested a bright green dress that I had spotted earlier this month and thought was really attractive, however I didn’t want to make that much of a statement in a room full of real estate folks.
I tried (unsuccessfully) to explain again what I was looking for. A dressy suit of some sort, with a touch of color for the top. Something that said sophisticated but also said I had some damn style and I wasn’t about to either break into song or ask for the drink order. Of course they got irritated, (surprise surprise) and acted like I was being unreasonably picky. I think they were thinking Holiday Party, while I am thinking Work. Anyway, I finally stumbled into EXACTLY the right outfit but now you all know the drama doesn’t stop there. Apparently, don’t know my own size. The size 10 slacks that I thought were perfect were obviously too tight for my mother's taste. Did I mention she is a 14 but wears a 1x because she thinks everything is too tight?
I try the thing on, and she says all loud and wrong "Those are way too tight, get the 12's". I argue my case by explaining that the 12's fell down around my ankles and that they do not fit in the waist or crotch. She protests and tells me that the 10's (again loud as fuck) are entirely too tight and that they are (and I quote) grabbing me in the ass. Did I say this was going on in front of like 20 people in the store? No, well I meant to give you that mental picture and now you have it. I try again to explain that the 10's fit in the waist, and maybe they are a little snug in the thigh, but the jacket will cover the problem area as will the top I chose and that there is no reason to by too big pants when these are just fine. Why did I do that? Why lord?
Auntie decides to chime in and bring her "your ass is too big" two cents to the discussion. At that point to keep from being groped and pulled at in front of complete strangers and have the size of my posterior called into question at full volume, I gave in. My mother is taking in the too large pants as I type this. We had a full on pinning session where she hiked the pants under my armpits and argued with me again about where I normally wear my pants. Its just too much folks, I mean if she wants to play Suzie Seamstress let her, but let it be known the pants are too damn big.
So you are saying, what the hell has this got to do with customer service. Sorry, I am getting there, I just needed yall to feel my pain for a moment. So, the top and matching clutch to the outfit are a very soft gold. I had seen a pair of shoes in Nordstrom that I thought would match perfectly, so after being humiliated in front of a rack of strangers I was then allowed to go see about the shoes.
I didn’t find the shoes I had initially envisioned for the outfit, but I did find another pair that were a much better match. That’s when shit went awry. I picked up the shoe and started heading for these two young (maybe 17) male sales associates. You know that look when someone wants to run? That caged animal, which way do I turn look? They both had it. It was like they were mentally drawing straws as to who was going to get stuck helping me. The little white one came up short and the black one fled. I showed him the shoe, told him my size and sat down. 10 min later he returned looking bewildered. He came over and I said "Did you have them?" I shit you not, the boy said "I found the box" and stood there in my face like one of us was crazy. A damn box? WTF do I do with a box? This fool walks away!!! He goes back over to the same kid he was with when I walked up and they stand there. Looking completely ignorant. Now maybe I still had some anesthetic or Tylenol in my system because if you know me, you know that this is a situation that is about to get ugly fast. He must have seen my face and he moseyed back over and said "They sold them without the box" and walked away again. I was starting to think I was being Punk'd. That’s when my momma and auntie rolled up and demanded I go sit down and eat lunch.
I tried to explain that I was about to put foot to ass but they weren’t trying to hear it. Apparently I had been out of my cage too long already, and they meant business. Here is my question though. What was really going on with those kids? This is Nordstrom first off, the pinnacle of customer service, the same place a lady returned tires to. How do you screw up a shoe sale. Second, how about offering me a similar style or another size? Third don’t work if you don’t want to. Its obvious you two get plenty of room and board at home with mommy and daddy, do not mess with my shopping experience cause you are mad you got a holiday job. Finally, who hired these little bastards cause I want to know what type of drugs they were taking when they did it. "Hey that’s great you have no work ethic you're hired!"
Needless to say I went back yesterday and got my damn shoes in a half size lower. They fit fine, but they would have known that had they asked me. So I ask you, where did all the service go in customer service? What happened to taking pride in your job? What happened to the customer is always right? I was a waitress for a lot of years and though I am not typically a people person, I was very friendly, helpful and efficient because that’s where my money came from. If I wanted to eat, I had to be good at my job, and I was even when I didn’t like it. Even when I was tired or sick or angry about some homelife shit. Someone let me know, cause I don’t understand it.