Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Tell Me When To Go

Well folks the time has finally come for me to move. I know you are thinking "didn't she buy that place a month ago?" Well, yeah but it really hadn't ever been updated.....ever, like since ground breaking, or inception or Methuselah's first birthday. I am not saying it was unlivable, it just needed some work. Like plumbing, and painting and weather stripping and electrical work. Sure I could have waited till I got in to start this, but really why do that if there is a nice warm bed and a working shower upstairs? Exactly, I am opting to stick it out here until the work is done. I still have a shit ton to accomplish before Friday, but that is neither here nor there. I have to get the electrician in, buy some new overhead lights, a rug for the living room, a new ceiling fan, my garbage disposal running, a few more coats of paint and that's that.

I know I always promise shit like pictures but you know I am not going to do it. I am just trying to get shit together and get my house the way I want. Oh yeah and I decided to be VERY selective about who gets invited over. I am tired of folks treating my house like the damn Greyhound bus terminal. Stopping by is some shit you do to your parents. Don't come through without calling me for real. I am not going to answer the door and I will be bold as hell about that shit. You might see me sitting on the couch watching Project Runway on my Tivo while you ring my brand new doorbell. I am just saying unless you get an invite don't bother. I am trying to make my little old ass home a tranquil and comforting space and you know what that means. Don't make me sing uncle Ruckus song okay?

And yes...my mother has gotten another mover. Don't even go there cause I don't want to discuss it. The alternative is to invite people over to help that I don't want in my damn house. Trust me, I've had offers, but that might mean I have to give you my damn address, and we all know that isn't going to happen. I just want peace and quiet and I may not even have a housewarming come to think of it. People get out of pocket and start bumping into freshly painted walls or breaking up your expensive bar ware. I vote no. Drop a bottle of red wine at the corner and I will send the boy to pick it up. Oh, and can I just give big ups to Home Depot and Lowe's? Y'all know how to work some shit OUT.

Okay, I am going to go drink more wine and call it a night.


Anonymous said...

You are too funny...

44Black said...

We used to call them 'Pop Tarts' because they pop up unannounced. I have talked to unwanted guests from my upstairs window, "Stop ringing the damn doorbell, my show is on and I ain't answering." BTW let them know that calling from the cell in front of the house does not count either!