Sunday, October 24, 2010

Bitch are you crazy?

I've seen some pretty bold things in my day. I've seen all types of people talk slick and attempt to get away with it. I've seen folks pretend they aren't throwing shade when they clearly are and I've seen some pretty blatant attempts at presenting fuckery as genuine however, never in all my years have I heard of something this bold. The honorable (and I use that term as loosley as I do when describing Nikki Minaj as a rapper) Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas wife Virginia "Ginni" Lamp Thomas lost her mind and got real reckless last week. In some misguided folly, Mrs. Thomas decided that 19 years was just too long to sit quiet and picked up her flip phone (come on you know all know that old batch got a jitterbug flip phone) and dialed up Anita Hill.

Write for your audiance Avin. First, I forget that some of yall were still in diapers when this went down. My baby neice who was born in 91 is now almost twenty and has a child and a husband. My son wasnt even thought of, and my boyfriend was 10 (yeah I like em young so what?) so lets take it back.

Back before the black community started referring to Justice Thomas as Uncle Clarence Thomas on a fulltime and regular basis. This crazy negro was chairman of the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. Anita Hill worked with/for him and spent an inordinate amount of time fending off repeated advances and other acts of workplace fuckery. Some of which were graphic recountings of hardcore pornography, and asking his female coworkers about their breast size. There was also some random ass foolishness about pubic hairs and coke cans. So when the Thomas confirmation hearings began, all of this came to light. Even crazier was the fact that he was presenting himself as some sort of ultra conservative with a lily white wife. He likened it to some sort of high tech lynching. I dont have a clue what was high tech about anything in 1991 with the exception of the Sony Discman but hey, you call it dancing I call it shuffling. Mind you, I was only 15 so even my memory on all this is a little hazy. I was way too interested in De La Soul, herringbone chains and Champion sweatshirts. You want more info, google it.

Now, maybe you are thinking that after all these years Ginni wanted to bury the hatchet and offer Ms. Hill an olive branch. You sadly would be incorrect. Mrs. Thomas in her infinite wisdom made that call for one reason and one reason only. To ask the woman who suffered untold amounts of public humiliation at the hands of her crazy ass husband for an apology. In fact, here is the exact message she left:

“I would love you to consider an apology sometime and some full explanation of why you did what you did with my husband. So give it some thought and certainly pray about this and come to understand why you did what you did. OK, have a good day.”

That sound you just heard was the collective WTF from every black woman in the nation. First, let's talk about the logistics of this here call. Ms. Hill, a professor of social policy, law, and women's studies at Brandeis University received this call on her work voicemail. Now I don't know about you but I can not even fathom someone calling me on my job to solicit a donation much less an apology. This is my damn place of business. If it's not work related you better stay the hell off my phone. Second, the context of this call should have been enough to send Ms. Hill downstairs to her car to remove her jewelry and Vaseline her situation before taking a road trip to beat the brakes off this bold ass bitch. Third, in what alternate universe does Ginni Thomas live in that would suggest to her it would be a grand ass idea to ask the woman her husband sexually harassed for an apology?

Now, to Ms. Hills credit she didn't gather her homegirls and ride on that bitch. No, she simply listened to the message and turned the recording over to the police. Kudos to her for displaying both class and professionalism during what I can only imagine was a very stressful and crazy incident. Had that been me, you, my momma, your momma, Janice down at the post office, Ke-Ke in accounting or Barbara who works the desk at your hairdresser we'd have all been in jail right now or at least the lead story on the 11 o'clock news.

I don't know what would posess this obviously batty old white biddy to lose her mind like this but I sense it might be two things. One, she is attempting to put the spotlight on her new found profession in the Tea-bagger game. Thomas started a nonprofit tea-party affiliated lobbying group, Liberty Central, to organize conservative activists, issue score cards for Congress members, and be involved in elections. The group is aimed at opposing what she has refered to as the leftist "tyranny" of President Obama and Congressional Democrats. Or two she honestly is as fucked up and nutso as her husband. See I do remember her slightly from those hearings. Looking dowdy and brainwashed standing there supporting this husband who clearly wasnt the person she so desperately needed to believe in. She was sad. Look at her little milquetoast dress and tragic little haircut.

It was 91 but theres no excuse. Let me show you some picks of my momma at that time. It wasnt a game.

So, after shaking my head in disbelief over this nonsensical nonsense I discussed this with my man, my mother and my roommate. My man said that it's clear that Mrs. Thomas is some sort of bare-knuckle boxing champ the likes of Cain Velasquez because she would have to know she was the baddest bitch in town to pull a stunt like that on a black woman and not wind up dead. After I stopped laughing I knew that couldnt be it.

My mother simply chalked it up to the hype surrounding her teabag aspirations. She also said that if Uncle Clarence had any sense he was somewhere thunking the shit out of Ginni for boiling this shit back up to the surface. Yes, Clarence we had almost forgot about you up there chillin in the highest court in the land. Well...I had anyway.

My roommate (who is biracial half black and white) said that Mrs. Thomas was "a stupid white bitch" (her words not mine people) and that this shows the type of blind devotion to her man that only a white woman could have. She also added thats the reason she lets black men know up front that her momma is black in case they wanna get it twisted and think they got them a tan Becky to push around.

Truth be told some black men who like white women do so because they like the subservient nature and blind dedication that some of these women bestow upon their men. Is it politically correct to say that? No. Do we all talk about it? Hell yes. Black men have said it time and time again. They are tired of the drama and loud mouths that come with black women and they opt for lighter (pun intended) alternative. The chatter amongst us black women though is that nine times out of ten the black men that prefer white women wouldn't register on our radars anyway so it's no huge loss. I mean look at Clarence. You wouldnt want him and that tidbit only strengthened my belief in Anita Hill's story. She was young and attractive then, and though not young anymore she is still pretty fly.

Thomas on the other hand. Well just look at him.

No wonder you had to sexually harrass someone.
In any event, what do you think caused Virginia Thomas to take leave of her senses and call Anita Hill? I personally feel like its two fold. Part tea-bag crap and part heaping helping of salty ass hate. They seem happy dont they....Dear God 2.0 indeed.

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