Caddilac, BlackJack baby meet me out back
Get down, turn around go to town Boot Scootin Boogie
- Ahhh, you just ever had a morning where shit turned out right? I woke up before the alarm which is mindblowing.
- I was out the door exactly at 7:30 and I dropped off my son's PSP charger to him, went to the grocery store, had breakfast with the King, and still made it to work by 8:30.
- Hogmaw's is in a good mood
- I saw myself in a skinny mirror...dont you just love those???
- The boyfriend called to ask me which cruise I would like to take next year.
- Happy go lucky 90's Country music is playing on Yahoo radio
Life is so extra nice sometimes. Okay, lets get down to business.
First, I am not going to talk about Shittney Spears. If you want the bomb recap of the trainwreck she staged on dateline read Melissa's page. I cant even get into it with that level of detail. Her shit is clear, consice and funny as fuck.
I been feeling like death lately so I have chosen not to update with any type of consistancy. No one wants to hear about my health issues anyway. First up is Rescue Me.
I missed talking about the most graphic and believable asswhippin I have ever witnessed in TV history last week and for that I apologize. For those who didnt see it, Tommy finds out that Janet's been giving the goods to O'Reily (Johnny Gavin) at his fathers 50-11th birthday party. Apparantly Tommy dropped the napkin and these two are playing squeeze the knee under the table. Kids all close, grandad like 2 feet away. Damn, yall just couldnt wait could you? So Tommy catches the hand holding and proceeds to dive across the table for O'Reily's throat. From there it turns into a UFC fight with Tommy using every elbow and ground and pound tactic his Irish streetfightin ass can think of. Janet's dumb ass tries to intervene but she gets knocked back.
FFWD - Tommy sends O'Reily through a car window, walks off, Janet stays with dumb ass beat down brother bleeding in the street. This week, Tommy isnt talking about it, and the focus shifts to him and Mrs. Turberdy's (sp) ho ass. I have no love for this storyline. Anyway, long story short Franco is screwing Susan Sarandon, Lou is broke and a pissy drunk on weekends and evenings, and Probie is GHEY! Or at least thats how they made it look. Oh and Tommy knows that Sean is sleeping with his sister Maggie. So much for this week.
Next up SYTYCD...I dont have the energy.
The Ultimate Fighter
I find this show so disturbingly addictive. Its like Real World but you get the pound the crap out of your roommates every week...wait bad example. Its like Tough Enough season 1, but without the women, Hardcore Holly and the back injuries. This was the last show to determine which four would fight it out for on the 24th for the Middleweight and Light Heavyweight titles, oh and for a UFC contract. The first fight between Ed and Rory was not half as entertaining as watching the two of them fuck up each other's gear. Kendall Grove started all that shit by writing Rory is gay all over the house and on his gear. Rory, who I think is a lil slow to begin with, immediately thought it was Ed. Now, the backstory on Rory (hey that rhymed) is that he is just a dirty ass slob. Anytime you have other dudes calling you funky and dirty, you know its a problem. Ed used to room with the slob, but couldnt seem to keep the level of funk from fucking with him, so he first moved in a plant, when that shit didnt work, he moved the fuck out.
Cut to the gym a few days later. Rory apparantly feeling slighted by Ed's decision to move out, makes the incorrect assumption that Ed was fucking with his gear. Corky takes out a magic marker and writes all kinds of 3rd grade BS all over Ed's gear oh and did I mention, he took Ed's glove and wiped his bare stankin ass with it. Ed in turn finds out and decides to piss on Rory's headgear amongst some other juvenile BS. In the end they have a screaming match, and the the actual fight, in which Ed (who previously looked like he just wanted to go the fuck home) commenced to taking Rory all the way down to Chinatown in round two. Tito was lookin mad dissapointed in Rory, and he knew old dude just basically waved the white flag. Pitiful, you discrace Team Ortiz!
Next fight was between the British Brawlers Mike (I whip ya when I wanna) Bisping and Ross (kick a mufugga when he's down) Pointon. I was sorta worried about this one, but that flying knee that shot out of no where and connected with Ross chin was the precursor to a can of jolly ol'e British ass kickin courtesy of "The Count" Done deal! Pack your shit Ross and say hi to the queen for me, cause your ass is going home. Anyway, the fight was off the meter and everyone was happy go lucky at the end! They even promised to have a pint afterwards!
All this shit was the lead up to the much anticipated Shamrock vs. Ortiz fight. I'll discuss that one later.
Well one last thing, this morning in my haste to leave I made the mistake of spilling some shmutz on my pants. So I get one of those new Tide On the Go thingies and 5 mins later the stain is gone and I dont look like a jackass with shmutz on her pants. Seriously, go cop that shit, its mad crucial. Yeah anyway it works.